Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him.Psalm 62:5
As I kissed my girl goodbye and reassured her that everything would be okay, the nurse leading her to the OR looks over at me with confidence and says, “Okay, Mom, you can wait in this room until surgery is complete and the doctor will come talk to you.”
So, I wait…
Waiting is always the hardest! Especially when your child is in the hands of a surgeon. So, what do I do while I wait?! I talk to Jesus because it’s only through Him that I have peace. He calms my anxious heart and reminds me that He is with me. He reminds me of his promises that in quietness and confidence is my trust. (Isaiah 30:15) I can be still and know that He is God! (Psalm 46:10) That’s a big, bold statement that carries so much hope!
The Bible is full of scriptures on waiting. Although waiting is incredibly hard, it’s essential in life. Everything has a wait time whether we like it or not. Waiting requires patience, and truthfully, I’m not the most patient person. Waiting challenges the core of me!
I have learned that He is in the waiting. I’ve learned that while I wait, He works. And He promises to work all things for my good because I love him! (Romans 8:28) As I wait, He renews my strength because waiting can sometimes cause us to grow weary. Weariness has the potential to rob the best of us. For me, weariness causes me to carry an unnecessary and sometimes an unbearable weight. It can cause my mind to drift to a place of worry and fear. Although those emotions are normal, they are never helpful! What’s helpful is when I recognize that He, above anyone or anything else, is sovereign. He is for me and not against me! Regardless of what I face or walk through, He is always with me!
In January 2018, after having surgery to remove a spot that was confirmed as melanoma on my leg, I had to wait 8 weeks for a report to determine whether or not the cancer was completely removed or it had spread through my lymphatic system. Those 8 weeks were probably the longest and hardest 8 weeks of my life! I knew what melanoma meant. After working for a dermatologist for 3 years, I knew more than I wished I knew. I had a choice – to choose to worry in the waiting or to choose peace. The more I leaned into the arms of my Father, the more my heart rested in the calm assurance that everything was going to be okay! The more I focused on the hope I have in Him, the less I worried. The more time I spent in praise and worship, the more peace my heart experienced.
Seasons of waiting, though hard, they push us to persevere, strengthen our courage, teach us to rest, increase our hope, but most of all they draw us closer to our Father. In every trial, every difficulty and in every season of waiting, He has been present. He has given me strength when I’ve been weary. He has calmed my heart with a whisper and stilled my soul with His steadfast love.
He IS in the waiting!
But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him]Isaiah 40:31
Will gain new strength and renew their power;
They will lift up their wings [and rise up close to God] like eagles [rising toward the sun];
They will run and not become weary,
They will walk and not grow tired.